The Birth and Black Holes of Songs

Whoa, what's up with the title of this blog? I thought it'd sound cool. Hahahaha. Well, while I was in Belize, I realized something. Even though I didn't have my guitar with me, songs kept coming into my head...songs that just birthed out of how I was feeling, how life was, etc. There was always a song in head whether it be new or some song I was listening to on my ipod (most likely Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol).

I also realized how fast I go through songs like...say how some people go through shoes or tissue paper. Hahahha. I'd listen to new songs and then next thing I know, I need new material. I starve for new songs....and hence, I am a black hole for songs...they are heard through my ears for a few times but then I don't listen to them again. Ok, maybe because the songs aren't catchy or very good but even like Muse's Supermassive Black Hole...the song is amazing...and I sang it a lot...but after getting home from Belize, I can't listen to it. LOL!

Going back to songs that are being birthed, I'm finding that theme wise, I'm shifting from the more worshippy lyrics to lyrics about life's stuggles and challenges. I think I'm at the point in my life where I'm more reflective than ever before. I think worship songs will come but I think right now, these life songs are just coming out from my heart now.

So, yeah, interesting. =)

jos

The Unknown

(I wrote the first verse while in Belize and came back and wrote some more. After hearing Pastor Tim talk about perseverence last night, the song took a different turn and the chorus was formed.)

walking away is so very hard
when you've played your final card
pouring out all that is in your heart
nothing left like an empty parking lot

letting go of what you love and hold
takes a measure of losing some control
uncertainty can be a real blessing
it keeps you on your toes, keeps you guessing

so take a step into the unknown
take it now and know you're not alone
so take a step into the unknown
you're not alone

falling down doesn't mean that it all has to end
getting up is tough but that is when you heart begins to mend

so take a step into the unknown
take it now and know you're not alone
so take a step into the unknown
you're not alone

Momentos from Belize

Here are some momentos from our trip to Belize:

1. Taking 4 hours to get to Seattle due to a detour on highway 9 after the Sumas border. Good thing we left early!

2. Watching the news on what happened in England at the Seattle airport before our flight. We weren't even nervous at all.

3. Riding on a 16 seater, single engine plane from Belize City to Caye Caulker.

4. Arriving at Maxhapan, cranking up the aircon, and wondering, "Where's the beach?"

5. Snorkling on the first day and Ron and I looking at each other..."Where's the fish?"

6. Snorkling on the second day at Shark Ray alley and seeing all the those sharks. Slicing my wrist on a screw on the ladder while climbing back into the boat. Blood and sharks....eeek!

7. Eating garlic shrimp. MmmmmMmmmMmmm!

8. Wondering what the floating stuff in the water was at the Split...it was drifting in a straight line...eeew!

9. Sitting on the toilet for a day after eating a yogourt plate in the morning. Good thing it was a rest day.

10. Having Ron knock on our room door at 6:15am saying "We're going to the Blue Hole! HURRY UP!" It was suppose to be a rest day for us.

11. Getting sea sick on the boat ride to the Blue Hole. It was so worth it though as the fish were amazing.

12. Meeting Zack and Andre and Pastor Elijah.

13. Touching a baby croc. Too bad no pics of that.

14. Falling asleep on a hammock with a cool breeze blowing.

15. Riding bikes with Christopher...wow...there were lots of potholes!

16. Drinking 12 bottles of coke at the Belizean Shores in 5 days...1/2L each...ouch!

17. Christopher 7, Ron 4, Janice 2, Jos 0. Number of fish caught at Ambergris.

18. Driving into San Pedro on a golf cart. That was bumpy!

19. "You drive like Germain!"

20. Tipping my kayak at the reef and falling in and trying to find my fins, mask, and snorkel in the water.

21. Trying to get back into my kayak. LOL!

22. Diarehha day!

23. Ron watching the SciFi channel...oh man...how many hours did you actually watch?!??!

24. Janice always saying "We need more group shots!"

25. Ron frying Janice's camera in the water at the Blue Hole.

26. Christopher and I quoting movie lines that we watched in Belize on the trip back home.

27. Purchasing my DL4 in Seattle.

28. Having the hot sauce in Belize. It's very hot!

29. Crossing the border into Canada in less than 2 minutes!

30. Being as dark as Danny! =)

jos

Off to Belize

Well, I'm off on my journey to Belize in a couple of hours. Still not excited. LOL! No worries though...I felt the same way when I went to Mexico in March. Just wanted to say thanks to Kerry, Jason, Christin, Nanci, and Cindy for spending time with me last night and just chilling before I leave. You are all amazing friends...sniff sniff...going to miss you. =)

Okie dokie. I better check for any last things I've missed...

blessings,
jos

I'm A Pepperoni Pizza!

Pepperoni Pizza

Robust and dominant. When you go for something, you go full force. You tend to take control of situations easily. And in return, you get a ton of respect.

What's Your Pizza Personality?

LOL! None of those qualities even come close to who I am! But I do like pepperoni pizza. LOL!

jos

Waterfall

Like a waterfall
Come fall on me
Cover me with healing
Wash me with joy
Saturate me within
Let grace overflow
Let grace overflow
And let me float
And let me sink
And let me drown
Deeper into You

Oh God, spread Your waters
And flood my broken soul
Oh God, spread Your waters
And flood my broken soul

Summer Retreat Around the Corner...Belize here I come!

Summer Retreat is approaching and unlike previous years, I'm going into it really drained physically and mentally. It's really been hard to pray, to do my devotions, to sit and wait, etc. to prep myself for the task at hand. So many things to look after. If I go to bed early, it's not because I'm anti-social...well, maybe I am hahaha...but it's nothing against anyone. I'll be resting unless for some reason I find energy to stay up late. I'd love to stay up late and have meaningful conversations...none of this spurious chit chat man...although, even if I did stay up late, I don't know if my head will be in the right place. HAHAHAHA. Then what's the point, you say! LOL! The point is that I'll be having some sort of conversation that I haven't had for a while. It's been hard working in front of a monitor with headphones on and shutting out the world and trying to get things done. Heck, it's been hard just having msn convo's but when they do happen and I'm available for them, it's been so refreshing. So, thanks to everyone who dropped a msg and chatted with me through msn. Calling me....I'd appreciate it even if it was just for like 30 secs saying that you were praying for me. LOL! Just to hear a voice other than my keyboard or mouse clicking, or Matt Bellany singing, or Massive Attack. LOL! But alas, phone calling is a bit harder to do as I can't talk that long. I have no batteries for my headset and talking about personal stuff in the environment that I'm in is kinda hard. LOL! And of course, everyone is so busy with things to do...especially in the summer. It's hard to make time for friends...I'm finding it hard to make time for people because of the schedule I'm on. I'm so tired by the time I get home (and I still do another hour or two of work at home...I hear those AIYA's!). So, yeah...ooo...visits would be cool. At least I can step outside of the office! HAHAHAHA!

All I know is that this time next week, I'll be in a different place, basking in the sun, on a beach, with not a care in a world, no technology to check emails, ahhh...I'm longing for that now. I'll be away from everything...everyone...'cept for 3...lol...although I'm glad they're with me....I can re-coup, refresh, and re-think everything.

Lord, let it come...after I finish this work....

jos